Hmmm... Let's see now. Ears cleaned thoroughly. Feet resolutely stuck to the floor. Fingers un-twitching. Heartbeat steady. Head facing floorward and unmoving. Face expressionless, with no urge to smile or frown. Pupils unreactive and un-dilated. Nervous system untroubled by excess adrenaline. Hair on back of neck - unruffled. Breathing - regular.

^This is not me preparing to listen to what could indeed be compared to the audio suicide that goes under the name of JLS' 'new' (about as new and as interesting as bread) single, 'The Club Is Alive'... it is me actually listening to it.

As you can see, four gay boys who spread vocoder on their vocals more plentifully than butter on toast doesn't really do much for me.

Is this supposed to 'crack' the States? Oh dear... they're parading shit in front of the world that's gunna make Britain look like a pound for talentless freaks. Mind you, we did a great jod of that at Eurovision didn't we?